Do we keep in touch? I’ll never forget you!
This week I had the craziest dream of my life; I dreamed that I met Elon Musk at a family gathering, and I ended up feeling something for him. It’s funny, I’ve never dated a man his age, but Elon Musk would be the exception to the rule.
What’s curious is that during our interaction, he told me he was a semi-robot, with layers of skin, steel, and flesh. What a crazy dream it was!
How uncomfortable it is to be with someone and awaken emotions. Sometimes I wonder why people spread bad vibes around. Love is like water; you can’t contain it in a single container because it gets contaminated; water must flow freely.
Did you know there’s a study that mentions that after four dates with the same person, as humans, we’ll always develop feelings for that person?
The study talks about how in the first interaction, the chemistry with the person can or cannot be trivial; you can or cannot “click.” It also mentions that there are interactions similar to methamphetamine, although it’s unknown why.
On the second date, closeness increases depending on each person’s preferences. And so on, up to the fourth date. The study mentions that after the fourth time you meet someone, you begin to develop feelings for that person, and then the study refers to emotional responsibility.
I call it “The Rule of 4,” and I never break it. When I do break it, I did sometime, oh boy! Emotions and problems are unleashed that I don’t like dealing with, as Hernán Jiménez, a popular comedian in Costa Rica, would say, “Se despi*** Tere!”
My analogy about water and love is that everything you try to contain gets corrupted or overflows.
Some people keep their relationships in a freezer, like frozen water. These are relationships that seem cold in appearance, but they stay alive due to interests that make the relationship work in the long run. Eventually, though, it comes to an end (there’s a statistic that attributes this to either death or boredom).
Then there are relationships that refresh you, like cold water. In any case, this analogy allows us to understand that even though we need these feelings in our lives, we can’t retain or preserve them for too long, unless you know the secret of “Ageless” life.
You reap what you sow; we’ve all ended a relationship or been dumped. This reminds me of a friend who shared a piece of advice during a trip to Spain. He said, “If you focus on moments, you never lose anyone.” Since then, I share that thought with him. I believe the worst in any human interaction is to put an end to it.
How difficult it is for humans to deal with their emotions, awaken them, and then pretend they never existed. Emotions are ephemeral in themselves. If you end a relationship, you can give those emotions some time to pass, and then you can continue with a friendship.
Nevertheless, I must emphasize that not all interactions allow us to apply the previous advice. Some people try to preserve water in bottles without understanding that water cannot be contained for long, or it develops microorganisms. The same goes for a relationship you try to contain without understanding that you should let it flow to keep enjoying it and keep it clean so that negative feelings don’t grow and contaminate it.
A German friend once told me, “I don’t need a pretty girl by my side, just a girl who gives me peace.” I’m a staunch advocate that “Peace of Mind” should be our top priority. It’s difficult to end a relationship in which so many negative feelings have been produced. However, we all must learn that even when there’s no friendship, we can extract the positive and wish for the best.
“No Hard Feelings.” Why this can be so hard for some people to apply in their lives, I personally don’t like to put an end to any relationship. If it were up to me, none would end. Therefore, I’ve been thinking that I don’t want to start any relationships to avoid these moments of drama. My best friend has a philosophy that applies to all her relationships: “I can be one of your friends; we don’t have to fall in love.”
I’ve always shared this thought until I once let myself go beyond my “Rule of 4.” He was like adrenaline; I didn’t understand why I felt that way, but I knew it would be like a comet passing very close to Earth, one you don’t want to miss, even though you know it will be fleeting. I also know that for many, I’ve been that shooting star that passed through their lives.
I’m not saying that all relationships are the same or that all are fleeting. However, I believe it’s essential to be honest with ourselves about our feelings and expectations. If your life doesn’t have room for someone, make it clear from the start.
The process of detachment is difficult, but we shouldn’t cut off a relationship from which we only have good memories. A Greek friend once told me, “I live for those unforgettable nights I spent with people I can’t forget.” I think we should try not to hold grudges against anyone. Each person must be capable enough to manage their emotions. If not, my advice is not to get involved in relationships, as there’s much at stake in these interactions. If you’re going to try, make your boundaries clear, so the other person doesn’t create false expectations, and there are no disappointments.
Each person must be aware of what they want as their main course. Oops! I mean what they are willing to accept in their life.
Let’s not hold grudges! good vibes to all who have known me and will know me! (they, ze).
Hope that “click” will come someday, but I’m not looking for it!
Bye now!
