Be someone who deals with business, not with drama..
I never understood why people are afraid of new ideas; I, on the other hand, am terrified of old ones.
The one who follows the usual path usually won’t have the crown. The one who walks alone will find themselves in places they never imagined before.
In this society, sexism still prevails. There is a value that we unknowingly take for granted and accept as part of our essence, and that is groupthink. It’s almost impossible to find someone who don’t prefers to follow the crowd rather than exercise their own opinion. It’s even more complicated because most people are afraid of making mistakes, and it’s always easier to make mistakes in a group, as many fear failing individually. This has a certain consequence, and that is conformity.
Recently, I watched an interview ’bout Emma Stone, which caught my attention because at the last Oscar ceremony, she won two awards in one night, and her biggest triumph was for the movie ‘Poor Things.’ In the interview, the host asked her if she is anxious, to which she answered yes. The journalist then asked her what advice she gives to all those people, like herself, who have to deal with anxiety every day (personally, I loved her response). She said that if it weren’t for anxiety, she wouldn’t be who she is today, nor would she have achieved so many goals she set for herself a few years ago.
Perhaps if you follow me, you’ll wonder why I loved her response. Well, because I felt very identified. I think that no matter how ‘conformist’ you are, there must be something you’re interested in or want for your life, even if that is staying in your comfort zone, you do everything to maintain it.
There’s a phrase I always repeat to my friends when they tell me that I project a lot of confidence in myself and in everything I do. Well, in this writing, you’ve also earned reading and knowing the phrase:
‘If I am someone, it’s because I feel like no one else.’
It’s just that I like to walk by my own ideals, to chart my own paths and venture into the unknown. I won’t say that my destiny is already laid out; I’ll say that I continue to create it.
You know why?
Simple, because if you don’t move out of your comfort zone, you’ll keep living the same situations every day, walking down the same paths you once charted when you did something different with your life. And in the end, living without exploring is like living in the shadows.
Now, this doesn’t mean that it’s wrong to keep a low profile or live a private life. On the contrary, I’m a fan of not allowing people to know too much ’bout me, you just need to know the necessary. I’m interested in them only knowing what’s necessary.
However, it’s one thing not to want others to see what you do, and it’s another very different thing not to want to see what you can do beyond the limits of your mind.
….
…..
If you’ve been reading me since day one, you know that I try to motivate you to enhance your minds, to set new goals, to leave behind old habits that have kept you living the same cycle, to work for yourselves, not to be slaves to the invisible, always trying to be impartial with the perspective of all genders, and to be primarily critical of everything mentioned in this paragraph… You know what I mean.
How important it is for any human being to pay less attention to the invisible, you know, because many times we become obsessed with these abstract things, and this is just a waste of energy. Personally, I think the movie ‘Poor Things’ starring Emma Stone exposed all the taboos in an interesting way. The ‘invisible things’ sometimes limit human beings from self-exploration, whether these are ideas, emotions, feelings, concepts, etc.
I’m not a specialist on the subject, but I consulted a friend who is a professional in psychology and law, who told me that the root of all problems is the lack of discipline in human beings, giving greater importance to the invisible, which is normally motivated by instinct.
Recently, a friend told me that she has followed my advice as an empowered woman so much that now she loves herself so much that she doesn’t accept any drama from anyone, nor does she create any drama for nothing. She said, ‘Kim, I think I went overboard in applying your advice.’ I had to clarify to her that ‘nothing is too much and much is too little,’ meaning that not loving oneself brings a lot of harm, and loving oneself too much diminishes it.
I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go, things go wrong so that you appreciate them when some advice that you were given was right, you believe lies so that eventually you learn not to trust others easily and trust your intuition more, sometimes good things fall apart so that better ones can come. I have a motto about it:
‘If someone you wanted or want in your life meets your requirements but decides to leave, say goodbye, don’t tie yourself down, you never know if being available will exceed your expectations when someone else comes along.’
Even though this empowers you as a person, I recommend that you don’t be too demanding and don’t force others to meet your expectations. In my short life, I’ve learned that of all the challenges life throws at you, the most challenging one is accepting people for who they are, without searching too much, without forcing them to change for you. I firmly believe that no one should change their essence to please someone else.
However, one thing is to change and another thing is to improve. We all have negative habits that detract from someone who has already turned their weaknesses into their strongest skills.
Let’s first understand that attraction in emotional bonds is not governed by the other person being at your same level, but if you don’t like that someone is at a lower level than yours, well, there’s a lot of work to be done there, either by finding someone else or by supporting this person in becoming their best version, not what you aspire them to be.
“Life is a tragedy if you don’t look at it with humor.”
Checkmate the possessive, negative, authoritarian thoughts. Be humble by accepting that you can learn something from anyone, accept that you’re not perfect, that being better than yesterday is the goal of each day, that my goals are only mine and yours are only yours, achieving them depends solely on you, not on anyone else, that you shouldn’t be like anyone else, and that you are perfectly who you are.
Being better will always add to the construction of your best version.
I emphasize that it’s very important not to shut yourself off too much. Forcing yourself to be like a robot will never add up. Making mistakes is the essence of being human. Allow yourself to flow from time to time. Sometimes not knowing what will happen trains you not to expect too much from someone when you interact in a bond. It’s about finding your balance.
So my advice is to checkmate fear, live it, laugh at it, avoid drama, take risks, and never regret, because at a certain moment in your life, everything you did was exactly what you wanted.
Remember, Nothing lasts forever, become the ‘nothing’ of your life.
Bye now! 💋
